98.3 TRY Social Dilemma: Is it Okay to Open Your Spouse’s Mail?


ALBANY, N.Y. (NEWS10) – Today’s Social Dilemma came from Joe. He sent me an email about an issue he’s having with his wife. This is what he wrote: 

Hi Jaime. My social dilemma is one I’m sure I’m right about but my wife disagrees. I just want to know, am I the jerk for being mad at my wife for opening my mail? Regular, old snail mail. When I was a kid, I was taught that my mail was mine, and to be only opened by me. I’m married for seven years. My wife has always taken it upon herself to open anything addressed to me. I’ve asked her several times to not do this. She just doesn’t get it, and the other day I really lost my temper. I had surgery recently, and someone sent me a get-well card. I was literally in the other room. And my wife calls out, “Who is so and so?” I said, “Someone I work with, why?” She replied “Oh, she sent you a card.”I went to the room she was in and just about lost it. I get maybe if I was out of town or something…but I was ten feet away and she could have handed me the envelope! Her response is: we are married and what’s the big deal and what do I have to hide, etc. Did I give up my right to simple privacy when I got married? Am I the jerk for insisting that only I should open up the mail that is addressed to me? Looking forward to hearing what you and others think. Thanks Jaime

~ Joe

It’s interesting. In my house, it’s pretty simple, if it’s a bill or something from DMV or anything that affects both of us, it doesn’t matter who it’s addressed to, either one of us can open it. BUT, if it’s clearly something personal like a card, or something from either one of our employers. or family members, it’s only opened by the person it’s addressed to. I don’t think Joe is asking for too much.

What about you? Do you think if you’re married, it’s okay to open your spouse’s mail? Let me know on the TRY Facebook page. 

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